I have been trying to write this post for over a week now but the words just keep getting stuck. Stuck in the place with all of the emotions.
Sometimes it feels as though the entire world is mourning something. Like every direction you look you can see the outpouring of grief. It is almost tangible. You can see it around the world, in your country, across town and down the street. Broken dreams, devastation, loss, heartbreak, terror, the list seems unending. There are days all you see is the rough and jagged edges of life that splintered and broke in seemingly unimaginable ways. It might be your life, the life of a close friend or family member, or the life of a stranger splayed out across the internet for anyone to see. It is evident in blank looks, angry glares, passionate outbursts, shutting down, silent tears or desperate wails.
Those are the days that weigh down with their heaviness. The days of whispered prayers because you simply can't speak any louder. The days where you fight for the glimmer of hope. You put one foot in front of the other and push forward. Through the confusion and questions. Through the tears. On those days I am tempted to close my eyes. To take every distraction. To simply not see. There is too much that I cannot fix and it is overwhelming. But if we refuse to look at pain whether our own or someone else's, we disconnect when we need desperately to engage. To engage in community, in relationship, in prayer, in love.
I used to think that if my contribution wouldn't be enough to make a noticeable change then it wasn't worth anything, but I have since changed my mind. At the end of the day I would rather have done something, anything, than nothing at all. Sometimes that looks like a phone call, a text message or a hug. A donation to the people with boots on the ground to meet a physical need on the other side of the world. No matter what it always means prayer. To the God who sees all and knows all. Yesterday our pastor was talking about the time period just before Jesus raised Lazarus
from the dead and he said something that I have heard before but just
hit where I was right now. That Jesus saw their pain. He was moved by their grief. He joined them in their sorrow. I am comforted by the fact that we serve a God who seems to cradle us
the gentlest when we are at our most broken. Who doesn't lack compassion
but instead sees our pain. And although there are so many times I wish
He would simply erase the pain it is a precious thing that He walks so
closely beside us through it.
My former small group leaders, Sam and Grace, are walking through a valley right now, long and dark. The loss of a precious child. And they are sharing that valley. Not on the other side when life is patched together, but in real time where honesty is the only option. It is incredibly brave to bare your soul at your breaking point. When everything is a raw and gaping wound. To be real about your pain and to allow others to respond about theirs in the hopes that understanding and healing can spread between words and hearts and lives. You can read Grace's beautifully honest words here and please be praying for them.
As people who have a promise of hope and peace in the midst of great storms we need to see. Don't turn away. Don't close your eyes. Simply do what you can, where you are, with what God has given you. You might not always see a noticeable change in the situation, but it will always change your heart. Sometimes I think that is half the point.
Keep Dreaming!
Monday, September 21, 2015
Sunday, September 6, 2015
Don't let the wolves in!
My world is quiet. It is the end of the day and the house is still. And I find myself craving the busy. The noise. The distraction. It has been a long week (aka three weeks) and I don't want to look back. I don't want to dig deep and analyze my feelings. I don't want to ask myself what has been going on beneath the surface. Because I know what is going on. I am hiding. It is evident by the stack of dishes beside my sink, the to do list left untouched and the type of clothes I have been choosing to put on each day. I pull out items based on emotion. That favorite shirt that has warm and comforting memories attached to it, the insanely comfortable "travel pants" that I am wearing at this exact moment, the loose t-shirts that I can pull on as though I am pulling a shield over my very self.
There are times when you feel the accusations everywhere you look. When the guilt threatens to choke the very joy out of you. If you could only be more, do more, say more, finish that project, organize that room, keep everything clean, be a better parent/wife/friend/etc. And let me tell you all of the distractions in the world won't help one bit. Ignoring just makes the monster bigger. The only way to kill the monster is to face it.
So you open your mouth and the words spill out. Messy and painful and disappointed. And with each word the emotions lessen and you see the monster for what it is - the attempt of an enemy who has already been beaten to distract you, belittle you, derail you.
I had a dream a couple of weeks ago. In my dream it was nighttime and I was in the living room of a house. I could sense that something was wrong or there was danger of some sort because I was checking the locks and looking out the windows. That is when I saw it bounding down the sidewalk towards the house, a massive wolf. Ferocious in the moonlight and the shadows. Without slowing it turned up the walk, bounded onto the porch and straight towards the front door. The only thought I had in my mind was this lock will never hold. And I was right. As I ran to brace the door with my hands it burst open and the wolf stood snarling mere feet away from me. I woke up with the words "Don't let the wolf in!" running through my head.
After the adrenaline faded (my dreams tend to be very vivid and lifelike), I of course started analyzing. My initial tendency is to take things literally so I immediately thought about guarding against a physical threat. But in hindsight I feel like this was spiritual. I also think that in focusing on the literal, I left the important things wide open and unprotected.
Every time that we let a negative thought run freely through our mind we are letting a wolf in. Every guilt trip (self-imposed or otherwise) that we give value to, every list of our shortcomings and past failures, every "I should have....", "if only I was...." speech that we give ourselves, is a wolf. Ferocious, snarling and ready to tear us apart .
We have got to understand the importance of guarding our minds and our hearts! We need to realize that there is a fight going on and we need to be vigilant about protecting our territory. Our homes, our relationships, our dreams and God given purpose. We need to be fighting for those things. They are worth every effort! We need to be in the word, in prayer and in community. Friends you and I can never fortify our "homes" enough. We can never guard every angle or protect every blind spot. Not alone anyway. We were never meant to do life alone. We need community. We need people to have our backs while we in turn have theirs.
So when you find yourself in the place of guilt and accusations, don't make the mistake of thinking you are alone. Find one of your people and let the words out. Listen to the truth that God speaks over you. Install deadbolts and solid steel doors on your "house" and fight for those things in life that are worth the battle! And if you happen to see someone else struggling in that place fight for them! Listen with grace to their words and be a truth speaker to remind them of how precious they are to God. I know I talk a lot about speaking truth, but it is hands down the best way to combat the lies. This past week in particular my husband and a dear friend spoke truth to me when I needed it and it breathed absolute life into me. Just as every lie is a wolf, every truth is a piece of armor. Build your armor and the armor of your people so thick that the wolves don't stand a chance.
Keep Dreaming!
There are times when you feel the accusations everywhere you look. When the guilt threatens to choke the very joy out of you. If you could only be more, do more, say more, finish that project, organize that room, keep everything clean, be a better parent/wife/friend/etc. And let me tell you all of the distractions in the world won't help one bit. Ignoring just makes the monster bigger. The only way to kill the monster is to face it.
So you open your mouth and the words spill out. Messy and painful and disappointed. And with each word the emotions lessen and you see the monster for what it is - the attempt of an enemy who has already been beaten to distract you, belittle you, derail you.
I had a dream a couple of weeks ago. In my dream it was nighttime and I was in the living room of a house. I could sense that something was wrong or there was danger of some sort because I was checking the locks and looking out the windows. That is when I saw it bounding down the sidewalk towards the house, a massive wolf. Ferocious in the moonlight and the shadows. Without slowing it turned up the walk, bounded onto the porch and straight towards the front door. The only thought I had in my mind was this lock will never hold. And I was right. As I ran to brace the door with my hands it burst open and the wolf stood snarling mere feet away from me. I woke up with the words "Don't let the wolf in!" running through my head.
After the adrenaline faded (my dreams tend to be very vivid and lifelike), I of course started analyzing. My initial tendency is to take things literally so I immediately thought about guarding against a physical threat. But in hindsight I feel like this was spiritual. I also think that in focusing on the literal, I left the important things wide open and unprotected.
Every time that we let a negative thought run freely through our mind we are letting a wolf in. Every guilt trip (self-imposed or otherwise) that we give value to, every list of our shortcomings and past failures, every "I should have....", "if only I was...." speech that we give ourselves, is a wolf. Ferocious, snarling and ready to tear us apart .
We have got to understand the importance of guarding our minds and our hearts! We need to realize that there is a fight going on and we need to be vigilant about protecting our territory. Our homes, our relationships, our dreams and God given purpose. We need to be fighting for those things. They are worth every effort! We need to be in the word, in prayer and in community. Friends you and I can never fortify our "homes" enough. We can never guard every angle or protect every blind spot. Not alone anyway. We were never meant to do life alone. We need community. We need people to have our backs while we in turn have theirs.
So when you find yourself in the place of guilt and accusations, don't make the mistake of thinking you are alone. Find one of your people and let the words out. Listen to the truth that God speaks over you. Install deadbolts and solid steel doors on your "house" and fight for those things in life that are worth the battle! And if you happen to see someone else struggling in that place fight for them! Listen with grace to their words and be a truth speaker to remind them of how precious they are to God. I know I talk a lot about speaking truth, but it is hands down the best way to combat the lies. This past week in particular my husband and a dear friend spoke truth to me when I needed it and it breathed absolute life into me. Just as every lie is a wolf, every truth is a piece of armor. Build your armor and the armor of your people so thick that the wolves don't stand a chance.
Keep Dreaming!
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Be Vulnerable. The End.
Ok folks....it has been about a month since I last posted on here. I feel like I spilled my heart and soul onto a page, hit publish, and then ran away like a scared little kid. It was surely too much, I was surely too much. Too much honesty, too much emotion, too raw, too messy....bottom line too vulnerable. That's the main issue right there. Vulnerable. It feels vulnerable to put words to your heart and soul when we are conditioned to guard and protect it. To keep it hidden and therefore "safe". But hidden is also where things can get smothered or forgotten or reasoned away.
You know what the funny thing was? Out of all of my posts that one got the most feedback. The one that scared me the most was the one that people seemed to connect with. What is it about seeing the raw in others that makes us want to respond? That gives permission for us to be vulnerable in return? What do you think would happen if we all took the time to do something vulnerable that scared us? Think about that a minute. Out of the million and one inspirational quotes we could insert here "Be the change you want to see in the world." is the only one that comes to mind at the moment so we are just going to roll with it! =) We don't get through life without hitting any rough patches. We know well the hard and the shattered places. In a world of broken and hurting people it is time for us as women to stand up bravely in our vulnerable spots and allow others to respond in the same. That is where God's grace will pour into every situation, where true healing can happen and where we get the incredible opportunity to link arms with our sisters and stand together! I am a firm believer that no one can truly thrive in this journey alone. We can survive, yes, but God has a whole different world in mind for us beyond simply surviving.
Y'all God is doing things in my heart and life right now. Stirring longings for community and authenticity in relationships like never before and here's the deal - I know I am not alone in this. I have talked to women who are in this same boat. Women who love those real connections, who love encouraging other women, or who have no idea what that reality would feel like but still desperately long for it. So here is my challenge to you. Put yourself out there with me for a minute by commenting either here on this blog, on the facebook or instagram links, or in a private message. It can be one word or one hundred words, but answer one of these questions - What is one area where you feel vulnerable? What is one dream is God asking you to believe in? What is one step He is asking you to take in faith?
And stay tuned for pics and stories from our Montana trip, detours and all! ;)
Keep Dreaming!
You know what the funny thing was? Out of all of my posts that one got the most feedback. The one that scared me the most was the one that people seemed to connect with. What is it about seeing the raw in others that makes us want to respond? That gives permission for us to be vulnerable in return? What do you think would happen if we all took the time to do something vulnerable that scared us? Think about that a minute. Out of the million and one inspirational quotes we could insert here "Be the change you want to see in the world." is the only one that comes to mind at the moment so we are just going to roll with it! =) We don't get through life without hitting any rough patches. We know well the hard and the shattered places. In a world of broken and hurting people it is time for us as women to stand up bravely in our vulnerable spots and allow others to respond in the same. That is where God's grace will pour into every situation, where true healing can happen and where we get the incredible opportunity to link arms with our sisters and stand together! I am a firm believer that no one can truly thrive in this journey alone. We can survive, yes, but God has a whole different world in mind for us beyond simply surviving.
Y'all God is doing things in my heart and life right now. Stirring longings for community and authenticity in relationships like never before and here's the deal - I know I am not alone in this. I have talked to women who are in this same boat. Women who love those real connections, who love encouraging other women, or who have no idea what that reality would feel like but still desperately long for it. So here is my challenge to you. Put yourself out there with me for a minute by commenting either here on this blog, on the facebook or instagram links, or in a private message. It can be one word or one hundred words, but answer one of these questions - What is one area where you feel vulnerable? What is one dream is God asking you to believe in? What is one step He is asking you to take in faith?
And stay tuned for pics and stories from our Montana trip, detours and all! ;)
Keep Dreaming!
Thursday, July 16, 2015
Clay Dinosaurs
I sit on my yellow glider listening to the roaring noises drifting out through the windows. They are making dinosaurs out of colored clay at the table. They laugh at each others outrageous noises and silly dialogues. The giggles are purely contagious and time freezes and all I want is to keep this moment forever.
When does it change? At what moment do they "grow up" and loose this carefree, wide-eyed, innocence about life? It seems like an odd kind of countdown and I just want to press the time back and stop that moment from ever happening. I want them to dream every day of their life in the childlike perspective where everything is possible.
Garrett tells me what he is going to be when he grows up on an almost daily basis. So far he has covered everything from astronaut to firefighter to circus performer. Without a doubt in his mind that all he needs to do is simply choose and it will happen. I never want him to start stuffing those dreams down deep inside because they are "unrealistic", "unconventional" or "unlikely". Do I think he will end up rocketing to the moon? Not at all. That isn't the point. The point is that dreams will change over time, the important thing is to keep dreaming. Because when you stop dreaming it isn't only the wild and crazy dreams that you dismiss. The little, one-step-outside-your-box, what-would-people-think dreams usually get tossed out too.
And this emphasis on looking the part has started early with Shiloh. Even with as careful as I am to not define beauty as something you put on or dress up it seeps in. In the process of getting ready for church the other day Shiloh said to me "I have a dress on and now people will think I am beautiful. Can I wear a necklace to church it will make me look beautiful." And I cup her face and look her straight in the eyes and tell her that nothing is more beautiful than when she is simply Shiloh. And I want her to hear me that it doesn't matter what she wears or how she accessorizes, what makes her truly beautiful is her heart, her smile, the way that she laughs out loud when she finds something funny, how she dances to her own rhythm and is unconsciously humming all the time while she flits through the day in her own little world.
And I feel like I am raw emotion spilling everywhere and this season of life is so tender and special to me. I feel like I am on this journey of finding myself for the first time in my adult life and it is changing how I see God and how I feel God sees me and it is this beautiful, precious mess that I wouldn't trade for anything.
And I wish I could just sit in your life and hear your heart. Your successes and your failures. What makes you laugh and what makes you cry. Your story. This life you are bravely walking out every day even when it is hard and doesn't seem to make a difference. I want to cup your face look you straight in the eye and tell you that what makes you beautiful is you being unashamedly yourself. Thriving as the person that God created you to be. To tell you that it is time to start dreaming again. That your unique dreams have worth and value just like you do. To tell you not to give up.
Can we agree that life is just better with those kind of moments in them and then make it a priority to be that encourager for another woman in our circle? Guys, life can wear you down and it is so easy to get discouraged and just plain tired. We need to be speaking truth to our people just like we need our people to be speaking truth to us and we need to believe in dreams, both our own and our people's.
Keep Dreaming!
When does it change? At what moment do they "grow up" and loose this carefree, wide-eyed, innocence about life? It seems like an odd kind of countdown and I just want to press the time back and stop that moment from ever happening. I want them to dream every day of their life in the childlike perspective where everything is possible.
Garrett tells me what he is going to be when he grows up on an almost daily basis. So far he has covered everything from astronaut to firefighter to circus performer. Without a doubt in his mind that all he needs to do is simply choose and it will happen. I never want him to start stuffing those dreams down deep inside because they are "unrealistic", "unconventional" or "unlikely". Do I think he will end up rocketing to the moon? Not at all. That isn't the point. The point is that dreams will change over time, the important thing is to keep dreaming. Because when you stop dreaming it isn't only the wild and crazy dreams that you dismiss. The little, one-step-outside-your-box, what-would-people-think dreams usually get tossed out too.
And this emphasis on looking the part has started early with Shiloh. Even with as careful as I am to not define beauty as something you put on or dress up it seeps in. In the process of getting ready for church the other day Shiloh said to me "I have a dress on and now people will think I am beautiful. Can I wear a necklace to church it will make me look beautiful." And I cup her face and look her straight in the eyes and tell her that nothing is more beautiful than when she is simply Shiloh. And I want her to hear me that it doesn't matter what she wears or how she accessorizes, what makes her truly beautiful is her heart, her smile, the way that she laughs out loud when she finds something funny, how she dances to her own rhythm and is unconsciously humming all the time while she flits through the day in her own little world.
And I feel like I am raw emotion spilling everywhere and this season of life is so tender and special to me. I feel like I am on this journey of finding myself for the first time in my adult life and it is changing how I see God and how I feel God sees me and it is this beautiful, precious mess that I wouldn't trade for anything.
And I wish I could just sit in your life and hear your heart. Your successes and your failures. What makes you laugh and what makes you cry. Your story. This life you are bravely walking out every day even when it is hard and doesn't seem to make a difference. I want to cup your face look you straight in the eye and tell you that what makes you beautiful is you being unashamedly yourself. Thriving as the person that God created you to be. To tell you that it is time to start dreaming again. That your unique dreams have worth and value just like you do. To tell you not to give up.
Can we agree that life is just better with those kind of moments in them and then make it a priority to be that encourager for another woman in our circle? Guys, life can wear you down and it is so easy to get discouraged and just plain tired. We need to be speaking truth to our people just like we need our people to be speaking truth to us and we need to believe in dreams, both our own and our people's.
Keep Dreaming!
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
"All that matters is that we're going..."
"We're almost there, but nowhere near it. All that matters is that we're going." - Gilmore Girls
This is one of my favorite quotes (from one of the best shows ever!) and it perfectly describes how I feel in this season of life. It is an odd muddle of dreams, discovery, change, routine, planning and waiting.
Today marks two weeks on our Seven journey!!! I am going to be honest, I didn't struggle with cravings very much the first week and I was actually naive enough to think that would continue...yeah right! Lol. The half-yelled words: "I just want the biggest brownie in the world right now!!!!!" may have come out of my mouth this week.... I have also come to realize that I owe avocados a serious apology for the many times over the years that I called them names or thought horrible thoughts about them! What was I thinking?!?!
So far Seven is both exactly what I was expecting and nothing like I was expecting all at the same time. It is in that limbo between expectation and reality that I find the grace of God. The grace that pries into parts of my heart that I wasn't anticipating. The grace that steadies frayed emotions and ushers in the deep rooted peace that I am so in need of. The grace to see the imperfect progress. The grace to trust God when the plan is unclear.
I used to run from those in between moments. They seemed uncertain and unsteady when I wanted something firm to grab hold of. But I find that incredible things happen when I embrace those times. When I sit down, breathe deep and still my heart. When I see it as an invitation to draw close to the person of Christ instead of searching for that next step down the path. That is when heart work happens.
Because bottom line, it isn't really about specific foods, or clothes, or possessions. It is about our hearts. It is about intention and attitudes and whether or not we are willing to give God everything and hold nothing back. No secret place that He isn't allowed to mess with, no items that we refuse to hand over. And would our lives look different if we intentionally set aside time every day to come to Him, hands open and trust Him to give us what we need and strip us of what we don't? I know the automatic thought pattern would be "Yes of course I can trust Him. He is God. And I want Him to do what He wants with my life." But in reality it is a struggle. I come before Him yes, but with my hands clenched tightly around those things that in my limited view seem necessary. I need them. What would I do without them? I am scared to loosen my grip because that seems to be a sure way to loose those things that I hold dear. As though the moment I offer them to God they will be whisked away never to be seen again. I picture God looking at me the way I look at my children sometimes. As I see more of the picture than they do, the things that they choose to be concerned about tend to put a smile on my face. I shake my head thinking to myself If they only knew how minor this is in the grand scheme of their life. or Two weeks from now this won't even matter. I feel like He probably has those exact thoughts towards me, and yet He patiently waits for me to open my hands to Him.
So. Incredibly. Thankful.
Wherever you find yourself today, take a few moments to be still. To draw close to Christ. To offer yourself. To open hands that you might have clenched. To voice those dreams that seem to precious and fragile to even speak. To simply be.
Keep Dreaming!
This is one of my favorite quotes (from one of the best shows ever!) and it perfectly describes how I feel in this season of life. It is an odd muddle of dreams, discovery, change, routine, planning and waiting.
Today marks two weeks on our Seven journey!!! I am going to be honest, I didn't struggle with cravings very much the first week and I was actually naive enough to think that would continue...yeah right! Lol. The half-yelled words: "I just want the biggest brownie in the world right now!!!!!" may have come out of my mouth this week.... I have also come to realize that I owe avocados a serious apology for the many times over the years that I called them names or thought horrible thoughts about them! What was I thinking?!?!
So far Seven is both exactly what I was expecting and nothing like I was expecting all at the same time. It is in that limbo between expectation and reality that I find the grace of God. The grace that pries into parts of my heart that I wasn't anticipating. The grace that steadies frayed emotions and ushers in the deep rooted peace that I am so in need of. The grace to see the imperfect progress. The grace to trust God when the plan is unclear.
I used to run from those in between moments. They seemed uncertain and unsteady when I wanted something firm to grab hold of. But I find that incredible things happen when I embrace those times. When I sit down, breathe deep and still my heart. When I see it as an invitation to draw close to the person of Christ instead of searching for that next step down the path. That is when heart work happens.
Because bottom line, it isn't really about specific foods, or clothes, or possessions. It is about our hearts. It is about intention and attitudes and whether or not we are willing to give God everything and hold nothing back. No secret place that He isn't allowed to mess with, no items that we refuse to hand over. And would our lives look different if we intentionally set aside time every day to come to Him, hands open and trust Him to give us what we need and strip us of what we don't? I know the automatic thought pattern would be "Yes of course I can trust Him. He is God. And I want Him to do what He wants with my life." But in reality it is a struggle. I come before Him yes, but with my hands clenched tightly around those things that in my limited view seem necessary. I need them. What would I do without them? I am scared to loosen my grip because that seems to be a sure way to loose those things that I hold dear. As though the moment I offer them to God they will be whisked away never to be seen again. I picture God looking at me the way I look at my children sometimes. As I see more of the picture than they do, the things that they choose to be concerned about tend to put a smile on my face. I shake my head thinking to myself If they only knew how minor this is in the grand scheme of their life. or Two weeks from now this won't even matter. I feel like He probably has those exact thoughts towards me, and yet He patiently waits for me to open my hands to Him.
So. Incredibly. Thankful.
Wherever you find yourself today, take a few moments to be still. To draw close to Christ. To offer yourself. To open hands that you might have clenched. To voice those dreams that seem to precious and fragile to even speak. To simply be.
Keep Dreaming!
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
Procrastination at it's finest...
Want to know something? I have been avoiding this. My computer has been staring me down for a week now telling me to just write it already! But I shoved it under the couch and dodged the bossy glares. (Yes at times I feel as though inanimate objects judge me...like the time a pile of dirty laundry was mocking me, mocking me I tell you!) =) Anyway, back on subject. I am not really sure what my reason for delay was. Jeremy and I started an adventure on July 1st. (Hang in there for the back story, we might get there eventually). I bought myself some time by deciding to wait and just "recap" week one, but alas here we are on July 7th and my procrastination window is at an end. To be honest I wasn't even sure I was going to blog about this, until I was chatting with a friend about said adventure and she exclaimed something along the lines of "You are going to blog about this, right?!?!"
Sigh.....I think I mumbled something like "yeah, ummm maybe, I wasn't sure, uh probably..." Or something equally as eloquent. There is so much to be said about those conversations you have at exactly the right moment that push you to dig deeper. This was definitely one of those. Jeremy and I have been talking/praying/dreaming for a while now about life. What we want it to look like, what direction we feel like God is taking us, how we want to structure our family, what our priorities were going to be, etc. From the big things, all the way down to the little things. There were some things we changed immediately, some that are in process and some we haven't even tackled yet. The bottom line was that we wanted something more. Different. Deeper. Real. To be incredibly honest here we wanted our lives to look like Christ in a way that they hadn't before. When we looked at our actions, thoughts, patterns - even (read: especially) our "religious" ones - through the lens of the person of Christ we saw a divide. They didn't match up as well as we thought they would.
And please hear my heart on this next part! We are both incredibly thankful to have been raised in church and it is such a blessing to have that foundation. But for the lack of better wording in can also really mess you up at times. There are instances where I see such a difference in the way that Christ treated people and how "the church" treats people that it makes my heart hurt. (And before you freak out, here are a few things I feel I should mention at this point. 1. I don't pretend to have any brilliant answers, nor am I looking to debate anything. I am simply being honest. 2. I used quotation marks around the church because I am well aware that the church is vast and diverse in practice and belief structure. I realize that I only have personal experience with a fraction of it and I hate to lump it all into one box like that.) What I do know is that people are hurting for every possible reason outside of our church walls and there are people hurting for those exact same reasons inside our buildings as well. If we cannot figure out a way to truly connect with people, to sit with the hurting and broken wherever we may find them, then we are missing the point. And that authentic connection rarely looks like we think it should. It isn't wrapped in orderly steps, or in a neat black and white box. It is messy, uncomfortable, raw, costly. And if we approach it with anything less than the absolute love of Christ we will strike out every time! Whew.....ok, taking a breath and dialing back the intensity a bit.
If you are still with me then congratulations! You are finally going to figure out what the heck I started this post about!!! ;)
Cue back story:
Around the beginning of June Jeremy started reading Jen Hatmaker's book "Seven: an experimental mutiny against excess" and was immediately intrigued by the premise. "Food, clothes, spending, media, possessions, waste, stress. Spend thirty days on each topic boiling it down to the number seven. Only eat seven foods, wear seven articles of clothing and spend money in seven places. Eliminate use of seven media types, give away seven things each day for one month, adopt seven green habits, and observe 'seven sacred pauses.'" After only reading the introduction he turned to me and said that we needed to do this. I started reading it along with him and could not agree more. It is all about simplifying and stripping down life which we have been in the process of for a while now, but it takes it a step further. Not only recognizing the excess, but also how it affects or in many cases hinders God in our lives. Not just getting rid of stuff for the sake of minimalistic living, but to intentionally create room in our hearts and lives for God to move.
Sigh.....I think I mumbled something like "yeah, ummm maybe, I wasn't sure, uh probably..." Or something equally as eloquent. There is so much to be said about those conversations you have at exactly the right moment that push you to dig deeper. This was definitely one of those. Jeremy and I have been talking/praying/dreaming for a while now about life. What we want it to look like, what direction we feel like God is taking us, how we want to structure our family, what our priorities were going to be, etc. From the big things, all the way down to the little things. There were some things we changed immediately, some that are in process and some we haven't even tackled yet. The bottom line was that we wanted something more. Different. Deeper. Real. To be incredibly honest here we wanted our lives to look like Christ in a way that they hadn't before. When we looked at our actions, thoughts, patterns - even (read: especially) our "religious" ones - through the lens of the person of Christ we saw a divide. They didn't match up as well as we thought they would.
And please hear my heart on this next part! We are both incredibly thankful to have been raised in church and it is such a blessing to have that foundation. But for the lack of better wording in can also really mess you up at times. There are instances where I see such a difference in the way that Christ treated people and how "the church" treats people that it makes my heart hurt. (And before you freak out, here are a few things I feel I should mention at this point. 1. I don't pretend to have any brilliant answers, nor am I looking to debate anything. I am simply being honest. 2. I used quotation marks around the church because I am well aware that the church is vast and diverse in practice and belief structure. I realize that I only have personal experience with a fraction of it and I hate to lump it all into one box like that.) What I do know is that people are hurting for every possible reason outside of our church walls and there are people hurting for those exact same reasons inside our buildings as well. If we cannot figure out a way to truly connect with people, to sit with the hurting and broken wherever we may find them, then we are missing the point. And that authentic connection rarely looks like we think it should. It isn't wrapped in orderly steps, or in a neat black and white box. It is messy, uncomfortable, raw, costly. And if we approach it with anything less than the absolute love of Christ we will strike out every time! Whew.....ok, taking a breath and dialing back the intensity a bit.
If you are still with me then congratulations! You are finally going to figure out what the heck I started this post about!!! ;)
Cue back story:
Around the beginning of June Jeremy started reading Jen Hatmaker's book "Seven: an experimental mutiny against excess" and was immediately intrigued by the premise. "Food, clothes, spending, media, possessions, waste, stress. Spend thirty days on each topic boiling it down to the number seven. Only eat seven foods, wear seven articles of clothing and spend money in seven places. Eliminate use of seven media types, give away seven things each day for one month, adopt seven green habits, and observe 'seven sacred pauses.'" After only reading the introduction he turned to me and said that we needed to do this. I started reading it along with him and could not agree more. It is all about simplifying and stripping down life which we have been in the process of for a while now, but it takes it a step further. Not only recognizing the excess, but also how it affects or in many cases hinders God in our lives. Not just getting rid of stuff for the sake of minimalistic living, but to intentionally create room in our hearts and lives for God to move.
"Jesus, may there be less of me and my junk and more of You and Your kingdom."
So we took the month of June to continue reading and start praying about this step. As a friend of ours said, this doesn't seem to be a book that you can read and then continue living the same life you were before. We both feel like this process is going to radically change our perspective and bring us to some "put up or shut up" moments. Those moments where you have to make a conscious choice to either stay as you are or say yes to God and go deeper. It wasn't something we wanted to take lightly or jump into unprepared.
We started our food month on July 1st, so we are officially one week in! Our food items to eat for the month are: eggs, leafy greens, sweet potatoes, chicken, avocados, apples and bread. Only water to drink and the "free items" are salt, pepper and olive oil in moderation. To give you some insight into how this week has been I will share some excerpts from our journal.
Day 1
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times....yep that about sums it up. A few quick notes - I attempted dehydrating sweet potatoes...complete fail. Also, going 40 in a 25 mph zone is frowned upon by local law enforcement and might just cost you some $....sigh.
Day 2
Four words: baked sweet potato chips. Amazing. The end.
Day 4
We went to Homes County today! Free food samples everywhere.....need I say more?
Day 5
Today was the day that everything "clicked". That it went from plan to connection. Probably not a coincidence that it was Sunday and it felt like the pastor's message was perfectly for us. God is doing something in our hearts and confirmation is such a wonderful thing!
Side note - I just said I was really hungry and came back into the room moments later to Jeremy cutting up an apple for me. He is kind of the best! I then had the marvelous idea to puree said apple to spread onto a piece of bread. It was a little on the watery side so Jeremy set about to strain it for me with a piece of cheesecloth.....fast forward to him needing a change of clothes and the table and floor needing a deep clean....you get the idea. lol He is still the best ever! =)
Stay tuned for further updates. It is bound to be an interesting ride. =)
We started our food month on July 1st, so we are officially one week in! Our food items to eat for the month are: eggs, leafy greens, sweet potatoes, chicken, avocados, apples and bread. Only water to drink and the "free items" are salt, pepper and olive oil in moderation. To give you some insight into how this week has been I will share some excerpts from our journal.
Day 1
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times....yep that about sums it up. A few quick notes - I attempted dehydrating sweet potatoes...complete fail. Also, going 40 in a 25 mph zone is frowned upon by local law enforcement and might just cost you some $....sigh.
Day 2
Four words: baked sweet potato chips. Amazing. The end.
Day 4
We went to Homes County today! Free food samples everywhere.....need I say more?
Day 5
Today was the day that everything "clicked". That it went from plan to connection. Probably not a coincidence that it was Sunday and it felt like the pastor's message was perfectly for us. God is doing something in our hearts and confirmation is such a wonderful thing!
Side note - I just said I was really hungry and came back into the room moments later to Jeremy cutting up an apple for me. He is kind of the best! I then had the marvelous idea to puree said apple to spread onto a piece of bread. It was a little on the watery side so Jeremy set about to strain it for me with a piece of cheesecloth.....fast forward to him needing a change of clothes and the table and floor needing a deep clean....you get the idea. lol He is still the best ever! =)
Stay tuned for further updates. It is bound to be an interesting ride. =)
Keep Dreaming!
Monday, June 22, 2015
Potato Salad and Jewelry!
Talk about an odd combination! =)
It is the time of year for cookouts, bonfires, and other such gatherings. You know what that means? Good food!! Burgers, brats, potato salad, baked beans, and of course...s'mores!!! In the side dish arena potato salad is king and I have been looking for a good recipe for a while. Something rustic and different. Well let me tell you this recipe is perfection!!! Honestly when I first saw it I wasn't sure if I would love it or hate it, but it turned out to be amazing! I adapted it from this recipe.
Potato Salad
Mix the mayonnaise, mustard, pickle juice and garlic together and set aside.
Cook the bacon and green onions together until the bacon is crispy. Let cool and cut bacon into pieces.
Cut the corn off of the cob and chop the pickles.
Toss the potatoes in the dressing while they are barely warm and set aside for 10 minutes.
Add the rest of the ingredients and salt and pepper to taste and mix gently to combine.
*These are the ingredients for the dressing. I went a smidge over these measurements the second time I made this because I wanted a little more dressing, but that is just my personal preference. =)
If you have the self restraint to not eat it all immediately you can refrigerate it until it is chilled and your guests have arrived...or you could always hide it in the back of your fridge and run down the road for a tub of store bought to serve everyone else and save the good stuff for your midnight snack later...just saying, it's that good... ;)
Now for the sparkly part of this post!!! I won a giveaway from Emily Beachy at Everyday Beauty Co.!!! If you are looking to add to your jewelry collection or purchase a little something for a friend, check out her etsy shop here! She makes beautiful and unique jewelry designs and I am compiling quite the wish list! ;) Here is the necklace I received, and I had to include the packaging details which were simply sweet! I love when people take the time to make the finishing touches special!! I only wish my camera would have captured the sparkle factor better! =)
That's all for today!
Keep Dreaming!
It is the time of year for cookouts, bonfires, and other such gatherings. You know what that means? Good food!! Burgers, brats, potato salad, baked beans, and of course...s'mores!!! In the side dish arena potato salad is king and I have been looking for a good recipe for a while. Something rustic and different. Well let me tell you this recipe is perfection!!! Honestly when I first saw it I wasn't sure if I would love it or hate it, but it turned out to be amazing! I adapted it from this recipe.
Potato Salad
- 2 pounds baby red potatoes, cut into 1 inch chunks
- 3/4 cup mayonnaise *
- 1 Tbsp. prepared mustard *
- 1 Tbsp. pickle juice *
- 1 garlic clove, crushed *
- 1 cup peas, steamed
- 1 cup corn, cooked, cut off the cob
- 8 slices bacon
- 1 bunch of green onions, chopped
- 1/2 cup bread and butter pickles, chopped
- salt and pepper
Mix the mayonnaise, mustard, pickle juice and garlic together and set aside.
Cook the bacon and green onions together until the bacon is crispy. Let cool and cut bacon into pieces.
Cut the corn off of the cob and chop the pickles.
Toss the potatoes in the dressing while they are barely warm and set aside for 10 minutes.
Add the rest of the ingredients and salt and pepper to taste and mix gently to combine.
*These are the ingredients for the dressing. I went a smidge over these measurements the second time I made this because I wanted a little more dressing, but that is just my personal preference. =)
If you have the self restraint to not eat it all immediately you can refrigerate it until it is chilled and your guests have arrived...or you could always hide it in the back of your fridge and run down the road for a tub of store bought to serve everyone else and save the good stuff for your midnight snack later...just saying, it's that good... ;)
Now for the sparkly part of this post!!! I won a giveaway from Emily Beachy at Everyday Beauty Co.!!! If you are looking to add to your jewelry collection or purchase a little something for a friend, check out her etsy shop here! She makes beautiful and unique jewelry designs and I am compiling quite the wish list! ;) Here is the necklace I received, and I had to include the packaging details which were simply sweet! I love when people take the time to make the finishing touches special!! I only wish my camera would have captured the sparkle factor better! =)
That's all for today!
Keep Dreaming!
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