"All that matters is that we're going..."

"We're almost there, but nowhere near it. All that matters is that we're going." - Gilmore Girls

This is one of my favorite quotes (from one of the best shows ever!) and it perfectly describes how I feel in this season of life. It is an odd muddle of dreams, discovery, change, routine, planning and waiting.

Today marks two weeks on our Seven journey!!! I am going to be honest, I didn't struggle with cravings very much the first week and I was actually naive enough to think that would continue...yeah right! Lol. The half-yelled words: "I just want the biggest brownie in the world right now!!!!!" may have come out of my mouth this week.... I have also come to realize that I owe avocados a serious apology for the many times over the years that I called them names or thought horrible thoughts about them! What was I thinking?!?!

So far Seven is both exactly what I was expecting and nothing like I was expecting all at the same time. It is in that limbo between expectation and reality that I find the grace of God. The grace that pries into parts of my heart that I wasn't anticipating. The grace that steadies frayed emotions and ushers in the deep rooted peace that I am so in need of. The grace to see the imperfect progress. The grace to trust God when the plan is unclear.

I used to run from those in between moments. They seemed uncertain and unsteady when I wanted something firm to grab hold of. But I find that incredible things happen when I embrace those times. When I sit down, breathe deep and still my heart. When I see it as an invitation to draw close to the person of Christ instead of searching for that next step down the path. That is when heart work happens.

Because bottom line, it isn't really about specific foods, or clothes, or possessions. It is about our hearts. It is about intention and attitudes and whether or not we are willing to give God everything and hold nothing back. No secret place that He isn't allowed to mess with, no items that we refuse to hand over. And would our lives look different if we intentionally set aside time every day to come to Him, hands open and trust Him to give us what we need and strip us of what we don't? I know the automatic thought pattern would be "Yes of course I can trust Him. He is God. And I want Him to do what He wants with my life." But in reality it is a struggle. I come before Him yes, but with my hands clenched tightly around those things that in my limited view seem necessary. I need them. What would I do without them? I am scared to loosen my grip because that seems to be a sure way to loose those things that I hold dear. As though the moment I offer them to God they will be whisked away never to be seen again. I picture God looking at me the way I look at my children sometimes. As I see more of the picture than they do, the things that they choose to be concerned about tend to put a smile on my face. I shake my head thinking to myself If they only knew how minor this is in the grand scheme of their life. or Two weeks from now this won't even matter. I feel like He probably has those exact thoughts towards me, and yet He patiently waits for me to open my hands to Him.

So. Incredibly. Thankful.

Wherever you find yourself today, take a few moments to be still. To draw close to Christ. To offer yourself. To open hands that you might have clenched. To voice those dreams that seem to precious and fragile to even speak. To simply be.

Keep Dreaming!